This was my jaw this morning as I read Matthew 10. Let me pick my jaw up before anyone trips over it. Matthew 10 is about the time when Jesus sends out the 12 disciples. It was like a team meeting before they all went out to preach the message.
I picture them all lined up {like the picture below} with Jesus pacing back and forth giving instructions. I like to imagine all of their faces:
Look at the second guy. I think of him as saying "Are you kidding me?" That would be me.
Seriously though, my heart started racing as I read this passage. At the beginning of the passage, Jesus gives them authority to drive out evil spirits and to heal every disease and sickness. Woo hoo! I would be excited about that! Then Jesus says in verse 5 and 6 "Do not go among the Gentiles or enter any town of the Samaritans. Go rather to the lost sheep of Israel." Ok, I understand that.
Then it gets tough. Verse 9 and 10 "Do not take along any gold or silver or copper in your belts; take no bag for the journey, or extra tunic, or sandals, or a staff." I would be the idiot to say "Don't we need to make hotel arrangements and I may need more than one pair of shoes, and I must bring some granola bars in case I don't like the food there." Jesus wanted His disciples to trust in Him alone.
"I am sending you out like sheep among wolves." You're what?! We are going to get killed! I picture myself looking down the line of disciples asking them if they are hearing the same thing I am?! I really wonder what they were thinking. What emotions did they show? Did they show fear, were they about to throw up, were they excited?
"On my account you WILL be brought before governors and kings as witnesses to them and to the Gentiles. But WHEN they arrest you..." Arrest me? You didn't say if they arrest me, you said WHEN they arrest me. I would be sweating now and getting dizzy. Possibly tuning Jesus out. Can you imagine the thoughts Satan was trying to put in their heads at this time? "You don't want to follow Him. You will be killed and arrested. You just stay here where you are comfortable."
"All men will HATE you because of me" Crap. "WHEN you are persecuted." Double crap. "Do not be afraid of those who KILL." Triple crap.
"Anyone who loves his father or mother more than me is not worthy of me....anyone who does not take his cross and follow me is not worthy of me. Whoever finds his life will lose it." This morning as I read all of this, I just prayed. "God I do not want to be scared. I want to trust in you." He replied "Brooke you are not reading all of it. Go back and read again." So I did.
"Freely you have received, freely give." I have received unreasonable grace! There is nothing reasonable about the love God freely gives! I should be excited to freely give as well!
"When they arrest you, DO NOT WORRY about what to say. At that time you will be given what to say, for it will not be you speaking, BUT the Spirt of your Father speaking through you." Well that takes off some pressure. God is going to give me the words to speak. He is in control.
"Do not be afraid of those who kill the body but CANNOT kill the soul." So what if you die, you are going to heaven.
"Even the very hairs of your head are all numbered. So don't be afraid; YOU are worth more than many sparrows." Thank you Lord for your comforting words and love.
"Whoever acknowledges me before men, I will also acknowledge him before my Father in heaven. But whoever disowns me before me, I will disown him before my Father in heaven." Jesus is a great reference! How amazing would it be to have Jesus as a reference? I want Jesus to say "Well done faithful servant" when it is my time to be judged. But again, He can also disown you if you disown Him.
"Whoever loses his life for my sake will find it." Now I am not shaking so much and I am much more comforted. Jesus did not say it would be easy. It is a huge cost to follow Him. But it is worth it and God never leaves you alone. He is always there to comfort you and guide you.
{Sorry I didn't put references on all of the scripture, but it is all from Matthew 10}
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